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LEILA FADEL, HOST:
Tomorrow marks 30 years since the worst act of homegrown terrorism in U.S. history, according to the FBI. In 1995, Timothy McVeigh detonated a bomb outside of the Alfred P. Murrah Federal Building in Oklahoma City. Terry Nichols was convicted of conspiring with him. One hundred and sixty-eight people were killed, including Julie Marie Welch. Her father, Bud Welch, remembered her at StoryCorps.
BUD WELCH: Julie was my only daughter. She was 23 years old. And I knew that if she was alive, the first thing she'd do would be call Dad. And so I stayed by the telephone. But of course, I never received the call. I was so full of revenge and hate. I didn't even want a trial for Tim McVeigh or Terry Nichols.
I remember I went to the bomb site every single day after her death. And I was across the street from the Murrah building. My head was splitting because I started self-medicating with alcohol after Julie's death. And that afternoon, I asked myself, what did I need to do to be able to move forward? And I finally came to the conclusion for me personally that the day that we would take Tim McVeigh or Terry Nichols to kill them was not going to be part of my healing process. After I got that settled in my mind, I was able to stop the drinking, stop smoking. And I never want to go through another year like that in my life. That's the most miserable time I ever spent.
And I had seen Bill McVeigh, the father of Tim McVeigh, on television. And I don't recall a single question that reporter asked that day. But on his final answer, he looked directly into the lens of the television camera for just a couple of seconds. When he did that, I could see this deep pain in his eye, and I recognized that pain immediately. And I knew that someday I needed to go tell that man that I did not blame him or his family for what his son had done. And nearly 3 1/2 years later, I had the opportunity to do that. When I finally went through that process, all of a sudden, it was like this tremendous weight had been removed from my shoulders. And honestly, I've never felt closer to God than I did at that moment. I was able to start feeling a little bit of peace. And I say that in spite of the fact I no longer have Julie.
When your parents die, you go to the hilltop and you bury them. When your children die, you bury them in your heart. And it's forever. It's difficult for me to imagine what Julie would be like today because to me, Julie will always be 23 years old. That's burned in my mind. She'll always be 23 to me.
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FADEL: Bud Welch in Oklahoma City. He's still in touch with Bill McVeigh and considers him a friend. You can hear more voices from the Oklahoma City bombing on the StoryCorps podcast. Bud's interview is archived at the Library of Congress.
(SOUNDBITE OF CHRIS ZABRISKIE'S "THE 49TH STREET GALLERIA") Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.
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